Deciding what path to take

A little over a week ago I was talking about the Grand Canyon in my life and I have happily made a decision in this metaphorical life decision. After praying about it, thinking about it, talking about it, and loss of some (not all) sleep. I have finally taken the jump off the ledge, and I am ready to move on.  While I wasn't on the ledge for a long time it was great while it lasted and I am glad to say that I have jumped.

When I think about this life decision a Wicked  song comes to mind.  It is the song For Good. If you haven't heard it.  Look it up, you don't have to like musicals, but it is just a great song.  In the sang part of it goes:  "I've heard it said, That people come into our lives for a reason. Bringing something we must learn, And we are led To those who help us most to grow...." That is how I feel about this decision.  No hard feelings, and hopefully no awkward future meetings.  But in the past month I have gone on a roller costar and I have enjoyed the ride, but now it is time to get off and move on.

Tomorrow

We always say that we will say that tomorrow we are going to change.  But if we ever realize it, today is yesterdays tomorrow.  If we want something to change, we have to make those changes today.  Nothing is worth putting off till tomorrow.  We have to live our life today and not wait for tomorrow to come.

Yesterday I went to Mass in the morning and Msgr. talked about how we are all supposed to be trees that product good fruit.  I don't totally remember where the readings were from, but it talked about fruit trees. Somehow that is the only thing that stuck with me.  But what I took from it was even better, or so I think.  We just can't believe that we are good fruit trees, but we actually have to produce good fruit.  It is through trial and temptation that we see how capable we are actually at producing great fruit.  We have to also surround ourselves with other good 'fruit trees' because One bad apple can spoil the whole bunch.

So be a 'Fruit Tree' that produces great fruit!

The Grand Canyon in my life

So I have come to the point in my life journey that I have a Grand Canyon come into my path.  Just so you know, I talk in metaphors, so get used to it in this post.  I never really thought some decision like this would really come into my life.  I know that it is a big dream, but now where I am in life, I wasn't expecting this.  I just finished my Junior year and I am beginning to realize how soon the 'real world' is going to be actually starting for me.  In one year less than 365 days I will have graduated from college and hopefully (fingers crossed) have a job with a salary and everything.  :-)

This is why I realized that every choice that I make today will truly impact my future. Now I know that in the past all of my decisions have gotten me to where I am now.  But somehow I think there is a difference. People said that college was the real world, but it really isn't, it is just getting us partially prepared to live a real life.  Okay now I am ranting, so I'll get back to the point.

The Grad Canyon in my Life, sometimes on our life journey we come upon rives and mountains that we have to make it across to continue on with our life. Up till now I have always been able to make it to the other side without many bruises and scrapes. And I was doing great, so I thought that my life was going well and that I knew all of the curve balls life could throw at me.  Boy was I wrong.  In my life journey I came to the Grand Canyon, but at this point there are no bridges across just the extremely long way to get around.  I am standing on the ledge looking and watching the sun set and I know standing on the edge, at this Grand Canyon, I am happy to just watch the sun set here.

But life wants you to move forward and not stay in one spot for long, because how is that really living? So I have two choices walk along the edge of the canyon and take the long way around, but eventually get there, or believe that I have a parachute and take the leap and hope that it will open and the jump will be thrilling and get me to the other side.  But I find that I am not the biggest risk taker, when there is no guarantee that I won't get hurt.  Because if I do decide to take the leap I can never go back to the path along the ledge...

So now the question is do I walk or do I leap and hope the parachute opens?

Now I just have to listen to my head and my heart to lead me to the right path...

Sometimes we just have to be prepared

The saying is: "When life gives you lemons make lemonade." While that saying makes sense it really isn't helpful.  It is telling the person that if life deals you a bad hand or throws troubles your way, learn how to dodge the punches, and make the best out of the situation. The thing is that it is easier to just talk about lemons then really face what you are really supposed to be dealing with.

Everyone has troubles in their life, and at those moments it seems as if nothing can go right and you are stuck to deal with the problem.  No matter how big or small the trouble might seem to outside people.  That problem is a big deal to the person that it is happening to.  So there is no reason to judge other people's problems as compared to your own.  That just isn't how life works.

I think the best thing that people can do to help others and the people that they care about is to just be there as an ear for the majority of the time, and only use your mouth when necessary.  I've heard the saying that we are given two ears and one mouth, and we should use them in the same proportion, meaning use the ears more because we have two of them. Everyone just needs people to listen, even people that are used to just listening.  We all need someone to be there for us.

Who is that person in your life that could use your ears more? Who do you think needs someone to listen to them?

A poem to think about

So I am still working though the book I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris (don't get me wrong it is a great book, but I have been really busy with school) and there is a chapter titled Ready for the Sack but not for the Sacrifice it talks about how the majority of people think of marriage as one thing, while there is more to a marriage then the honeymoon or the wedding.  While all of those things can be great in those respects, it shouldn't be what we aim for when we think of marriage.

While I am still single I am called to remain holy in that vocation, but still prepare myself for whatever might come in the future.

That is a poem by Lena Lathrop titled "A Woman's Answer to a Man's Question". and I would really like to share it with you.

Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing,
Ever made by the Hand above?
A woman's heart, and a woman's life- 
And a woman's wonderful love.


Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing
As a child might ask for a toy?
Demanding what others have died to win,
With a reckless dash of a boy.


You have written my lesson of duty out,
Manlike, you have questioned me.
Now standing at the bars of my woman's soul
Until I shall question thee.


You require your mutton shall always be hoy, 
Your socks and your shirt be whole;
I require your heart be true as God's stars
And as pure as His heaven, your soul


You require a cook for your mutton and beef,
I require a far greater thing;
A seamstress you're wanting for socks and shirts-0
I look for a man and a king.


A king for the beautiful realm called Home,
And a man that his Maker, God,
Shall look upon as He did on the first
And say: "It is very good."


I am fair and young, but the rose may fade
From this soft young cheek one day;
Will you love me then 'mid the falling leaves,
As you did 'mong the blossoms of May?


Is your heart an ocean so strong and true,
I may launch my all on its tide?
A loving woman finds heaven or hell
On the day she is made a bride.


I require all things that are grand and true,
All things that a man should be;
If you give this all, I will stake my life
To be all you demand of me.


If you cannot by this, a laundress and cook
You can hire and little to pay;
But a woman's heart and a woman's life
Are not to be won that way.

I think that this poem, while a bit outdated (she died just a bit before 1900), but I think that it has total truth in what she says. Read it again, there is more to a marriage than one night, or the other things that you will benefit from.

Well a final paper is calling my name, so that is all that I wanted to talk about right now.

Life isn't clear cut

Through High School and College I always enjoyed watching movies.  I always like seeing how the story would unfold, and how the characters would get to the end. Half of the 'chick-flicks' that I watched you could almost predict how the ending would be, but the real reason to watch the movie was to see how they got to that point.  How through the hardship and conflict, it almost always ended the way that, as a watcher, planned it would.

The characters in the movies were awesome.  They would always have the prefect hair, the greatest smile, the perfect little circle of friends (where all of their friends knew and were friends with each other, for example FRIENDS, I mean what is up with that?), the story line, and the greatest background music.  Growing up, I think that I thought that was something to aim for.  The perfect 'movie story-line' life.

Now, before you say anything, I know that the movies aren't real and the actors who play the characters had real lives with real issues.  But there was always something intrinsic, something to aim for: the perfect movie romance, the perfect movie story, the perfect movie life.

But none of that is real, none of that is true.  In the movies that I grew up watching, the writers wrote the character script. The writers got to dream about how they wish life could be different, how life could be perfect.  But they knew that real life couldn't be that way, so they wrote about it instead.

Now you are probably asking yourself why I am even writing about this, why does it even matter? But I do have a point.  Growing up with those movies I thought that life wasn't going to be as hard as what I was expecting.  In real life, there are group projects, due dates that don't get pushed back, people who are above you that are horrible and their funny factor doesn't make up for that.  In real life there are no scripts that you can go by, no background music that emphasizes your mood, no flipping or fast forwarding to the end to see how the story is going to end.  There is no way to totally predict what curve balls life is going to throw at you.

 I have a great quote from a book that I am reading.  In I kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris he has a quote that the end goes: "... Rose-colored glasses are never made in bifocals. Because nobody wants to read the small print in the dreams." That is how it was for me, I had to get into reality, and realize that those movies, and their 'perfection' was nothing that I should aim for

In life we are not given a script to follow.  The people that come into our life, won't follow the script that we write for then in our head.  We have to realize that no matter how many scenarios we make up in our head, no matter how great they seam, they never happen just like that.

Life isn't the fairytale that we all dream up as little girls, Life is a roller coater that has its uphill climbs, and its stomach wrenching falls.  But what is so great about that is, we get to ride the whole coaster, and we get to see how it ends, no matter unpredictable it might be.